Maturity is not my strong point, at times like this.

I wanted to scream and kick and kill Rachel, but i know that i have to be a much bigger person then that. My first wave of emotion is rarely the one i should go with, because its generally the result of raw, unhinged pain and i make terrible decisions. The betrayal, disgust, all the things i was feeling, they arent realistic. Whats realistic, is i love him, he loves me. The rest of it is all just water under teh bridge. He's hers for a night, or a few nights, but he's mine for an eternity. So what does it really matter in the end.? It doesnt. Im not fine with it, not exactly. But ive generally come to terms with it. During the next month, whatever happens, happens. And i guess thats just how its gonna be.

On to other subjects, Allieee(: Shes adorable, and she makes me smile. And ya know, i really thought i wouldnt be able to, but im pretty sure i can kiss and whatnot with Allie :3 That aint nothing. And really, again what does it matter, She doesnt mean anymore to me romantically then Rachel means to Brendan.